Miguel, on my new favorite weblog, Feral Living, wrote a funny post about talking to your 14-year-old self, based on my post from 5/24. Does this qualify as a meme now? I really want to start a meme.
Month: May 2001 (Page 1 of 7)
I am genetically incapable of being late. While you might think this would be a good thing, in our world today it actually should qualify me as legally disabled. Whatever the designated time is, I arrive between 2 and 5 minutes early. This happens even if I am consciously trying to be late. Meanwhile, all my friends and acquaintances are falling all over themselves to see who can be the latest. I joke with a friend of mine that when he says “5:30,” that really means “5:45,” and if he says “5:30ish,” that means 6 or after.
Let’s face it, folks, being habitually late is just a passive-agressive way of asserting that you’re the most important person in the room. I used to have a 20-minute threshold – 20 minutes after the appointed meeting time, I would just leave. I’m thinking of shortening that to 10 minutes. If I can be on time for every single appointment, I think the rest of the world should make it at least 50 percent of the time. And that’s all I have to say about that.
Learning Biblical history with The Simpsons:
“Captivity blows!”
-Bart, dressed as a Hebrew slave in a Simpsons retelling of the story of Moses (played hilariously by Milhouse)
Things you won’t read about on ‘words mean things’:
-what I had for lunch
-medical procedures
-the identity of my prom date
-things other people buy at the grocery store
-my favorite ice cream flavor
-my instantaneous emotional state
-boy band news of any kind
-my sexual exploits or lack of same
-my exercise regimen or lack of same
-posts written by my dog (even if I had one)
-what happened in Algebra III this afternoon
This study would merit nothing more than an emphatic ‘Duh!’ were it not so out of step with the right wing’s view that if we don’t talk about it, they won’t do it. Now we just have to get Joycelyn Elders her job back.
Word that must be forced into a tiny ball, covered in gaffer’s tape, sealed in a tupperware container, placed in an impenetrable safe, shot into space and exploded with a tactical nuclear device so it can never be written again: kewl.
It’s been so long since I’ve blogged Salon, even Mr. Mosey must be wondering if I’ve been replaced by a pod person. Other than my “Iranian Supreme Court” post, I looked through the past 100 posts and didn’t find a single Salon link. So to reassure everyone that I’ve not been kidnapped and replaced with an alien simulacrum, I repeat a quote from Amy Reiter’s celebrity column:
“It would creep me out for anyone else to do Lamb Chop. No one could do it. No one else has ever put their hand in Lamb Chop. I would find it hideous.”
–Shari Lewis’ 33-year-old daughter Mallory on why she’s decided to resurrect her late mother’s sheepish puppet herself, rather than pass the baton to someone else.
Me, I’m creeped out by the phrases “do Lamb Chop” and “put their hand in Lamb Chop.” Ewww.
Guilty pleasures:
TV: Crossing Over with John Edward
Movie: The Money Pit
Food: Kraft Sharp Cheddar Deluxe Macaroni & Cheese
Music: The Carpenters
I’m sure I’m forgetting some. What are yours?
Saw “Contact” the other night, after picking the DVD up at Best Buy for $14.95. What a steal. Not only does it have this fantastic movie, but there are several second audio tracks; a mediocre Jodie Foster “what the hell am I doing here” one, and a great one with Robert Zemeckis where he dissects the complicated process of shooting the movie and the many effects shots. I know the movie is Hollywoodized, but it still is one of the best evocations of what it means to explore the universe – a great complement to “The Dish.” (see 5/26) I said at the time and I still say, I would jump into that “mission seat” chair in a heartbeat, without knowing the outcome. We are so earthbound in every way in this culture, and I celebrate anyone or anything that is willing to push the limits of what we know and understand.
Windows on the world
I was browsing through some pictures I took on my trip to D.C. last fall, and I came upon this shot of a window at O’Hare Airport that I quite like. Just thought I would share it – no reason.