Month: January 2002 (Page 1 of 5)

An interesting new online pastime is “Googlewhacking,” where you try to come up with two common words which, when entered into Google, come up with just one search result in all the millions and millions of web pages Google indexes.

Getting no results is much easier – just pick two incredibly obscure words. And word combinations with two results are more common than you would think. You need to get that elusive “Results 1-1 of 1.” Try it.

For a word person like me this is irresistible. I actually came up with two – but one is disallowed because it uses what is considered a Spanish word, even though you hear it in the U.S. all the time.

What are the whacks I came up with? Well, I can’t say. Because after all, if I printed them here, pretty soon there would be two results on Google, wouldn’t there?

Today’s lesson:
There is a fine line between being helpful and being a doormat.

“Men do not desire to be rich, but to be richer than other men.”
-John Stuart Mill

Two bloated self-important movies in as many nights. I need to re-evaluate my movie choices. 🙂

My main reaction to “A Beautiful Mind” is to offer to buy Jennifer Connelly a neck brace, so she will stop always cocking her head to one side, like an inquisitive deer. Memo to Jennifer, who plays mathematician John Nash’s long-suffering but really-not-suffering-all-that-much-in-the-movie wife:

The neck thing doesn’t make you look sexy or alluring. It just makes you look like you don’t understand what’s being said.

Heather wrote a post about elevator etiquette, and it reminded me of something funny someone told me once. (Who am I – one of the Grimm brothers? Shut up.)

If you really want to freak out strangers with the least amount of effort possible, just face away from the door when you’re in an elevator. This works when you’re by the door, so you’re staring at everyone else, and even better when you’re in the back of the elevator, staring at the back wall.

Try it sometime.

Gosford Park (an analysis)

Minutes of character development and exposition: 135
Minutes of plot: 5 (the last five)

Despite those 135 delightful minutes in the life of an English country house and its 162 inhabitants (both above- and below-stairs), I have only the barest grasp on who all those characters were, much less their names. Not exactly a home run for Robert Altman.

Today Xkot linked to the Realdoll site, where they sell realistic-looking full-size silicon sex dolls for $6,000-$7,000, depending on “features.” (Don’t blame me for American culture, people.) The “frequently-asked questions” page is particularly fascinating. Here are some of my favorites (you can make up your own answers for extra entertainment):

-Does the silicon flesh have a foul odor or flavor?
-Tell me more about Realdoll’s breasts.
-Do you sell body parts separately?

and the best one, by far:

-What is your return policy?

Soon after I moved into my apartment on Ashford Lane, off the Beltline on Madison’s south side, a woman was strangled to death in an apartment nearby. My friends joked that I should have waited longer to begin my murderous rampage in the neighborhood.

Well, I’ve lived on Lake Monona for three years, so I think I’m off the hook for this. Especially because I have a fear of falling through the ice myself.

Added a “hire me” link on the right to my freelance site. Did I mention I could use some work? Well, if I didn’t before, I just did.

Just noticed that Jon-Jon linked to me, calling words mean things “gleefully snarky.”

That’s a compliment, right?