Month: October 2002 (Page 6 of 6)

Ask a conservative and a liberal where they want to go for lunch.

Conservative: Wong’s Garden.

Liberal: Well, there’s a lot of good places. There’s that new Italian place down the road, and The Parthenon is good. I wouldn’t mind going to Wong’s Garden, either, although the last time I was there I didn’t like it. Anywhere is fine, I guess.

Where do you think the three of you will be going for lunch?

I think the main reason conservatives triumph in so many situations is that they are so damn sure of themselves in any situation. And people naturally gravitate toward certainty, even if it’s patently wrong.

This morning I watched Asst. Sec. of Defense Richard Perle and Gore’s national security advisor Leon Fuerth “debate” the coming war on Iraq on “Meet the Press.” Fuerth was so wishy-washy it made me sick. If he said “Well, I think Dick and I agree on this point” one more time, I was going to shoot out the TV like Elvis on a fried banana sandwich bender.

And no matter what the question, Perle had a forceful and assertive answer. This isn’t just a matter of personal style. Liberals equivocate, they “see all sides of the issue.” Especially now, they need to get a backbone and say what they mean. There’s a lot riding on this.

“Get with it, Sally. All the cool kids are worried about Saddam now!”

I really like Joss Whedon’s new series “Firefly.” The cast is interesting to watch, the tone is right on, and unlike many others I’m intrigued by the premise (science fiction western) rather than turned off by it. Given a little breathing room, I think it could be fantastic.

But there’s something wrong with the sound design. I had to eventually turn on the closed captioning and keep it on, rather than miss big chunks of the dialogue. (This doesn’t happen with other shows. I’m old, but not that old.) The background music and effects are too loud, and/or the dialogue is muffled. I hope they can fix this problem – it’s the only thing making me hesitant to watch in the long run.

Quote of the week

[from an IM conversation, since I haven’t jumped on the “quoting IMs” bandwagon as of yet. And who am I to buck a trend?]

I feel that chat is like the “speed chess” of written communication. Most people play checkers.

-John Kusch, blee bloo blar BLOG and other enterprises

Bruce Paltrow, who produced and directed The White Shadow and St. Elsewhere, died this week. St. Elsewhere especially is considered a forerunner for all kinds of episodic TV that came after it. I think his widow, Blythe Danner, and the rest of us should be a little ticked off that he is primarily known, both in death and life, as Gwyneth’s dad. Better his death not be mentioned on Entertainment Tonight (!) at all, than under the headline, “Gwyneth’s Dad Dies.”

Even if I didn’t think she’s a marginally-talented actress with inexplicable fame, I would still think this is a shoddy way to treat an accomplished and talented man’s life.

One of my favorite things about my daily walk around the neighborhood is overhearing snippets of conversations people have in the street, on their porch, etc. They don’t know me, I don’t know them, and they have no idea I can even hear what they are saying. It’s one of the few times where you can be convinced you’re not just living in The Matrix, that there is indeed a world outside of your own consciousness. Which is a comforting thought, if you ask me.

Russian mail order brides want to meet me!

Subject: I’m interested in you

Hello
My name is Svetlana. I live in St. Petersberg and I am looking for a real relationship with a real man. I signed up with this internet service to meet good western men, I hope you are really there. Please see and write me here if you like me.

Should I be concerned that she misspelled St. Petersburg? I mean, isn’t this on the level?

Worst advertising slogan of the month

“Quik Trip – You’re going there anyway!”

And don’t even get me started on the spelling.

Word of the day: indefatigability

Just to show how bored and listless I’ve been lately, I sat down tonight and watched “Showgirls” on TNN, complete with badly-done dubbing of bad words and even worse digital undergarments pasted over all the naughty bits. (And you thought my Anna Nicole anecdotes were the worst it could get.) This has got to be the most unintentionally funny major studio production ever made. (Troll 2 was not a major studio film.) Watching Elizabeth Berkley flounce around looking like a cross between a blowup sex doll and a deranged clown with a neurological disorder was quite entertaining, I must admit. Throw in endless nail maintenance, a papier-mache volcano, and Alan Rachins from “L.A. Law” trying to rub ice on Berkley’s nipples, and you’ve got yourself a spectacle, baby.