Month: December 2003 (Page 3 of 7)

Tom Ridge wishes everyone Happy Holidays!

Just in time for the Christmas travel season, it’s Threat Level Orange! Al Qaeda is trying to use planes as weapons, but please don’t change your plans! We have everything under control! But you should still be pretty freaked out. We are. Seriously. I mean, we don’t know, you don’t know, it’s a fucked up situation. There’s nothing you can do! Merry Christmas!

UPDATE: And for the kids, it’s Threat Level Ernie! Have fun, kids!

UPDATE PART DEUX: More high-minded debate on the subject of terror warnings over at Dean Esmay. I’ve done all I can there.

Getting ideas

Some choice quotes from a New York Times story about how a majority of people in their latest poll would support a Constitutional amendment banning gay marriage:

The most positive feelings toward gay people were registered among respondents under 30, and among those who knew gay people.

Everyone knows gay people.

“I still believe that marriage should be between a man and woman,” said 49-year-old Republican Theresa Eaton. “If I knew that we had a neighbor who was gay, I would not let my nieces and nephews go close by there. I don’t want to accept their lifestyle. It can be acquired and it is not right.”

Theresa: I’ll bet you already have a neighbor who is gay. Be afraid. Be very afraid. In fact, we have your address and we’re firing up the van as we speak. What – no kids of your own? You’re not in one of those non-procreative marriages, are you? If so, shame on you.

“I want my children to grow up and be normal people like me and my father and my grandfather was,” said Ziad Nimri, 41, a salesman and a Democrat who lives in Spokane, Wash. “I don’t want my children to start getting ideas. They see it’s out in the open and you see men kissing men on television these days.”

Ziad: Your children *are* getting ideas. Like that gay people *are* “normal.” Watch out for those idea things.

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What the hell is wrong with this country? Why have we not gotten the point, when every other industrialized country in the world is light-years ahead of us on this? Why is it still even an issue? Your theories are welcome. I honestly don’t understand it.

UPDATE: Criticism of the NYTimes sloppy, slanted reporting by En Banc. (via Atrios)

Spam, spam, spam, ham and spam

Last night I received a can of Spam as a gift. (I was going to post the story behind this, but it’s just too complicated for the payoff you’d get.) Which leads to a question – has anyone actually eaten this stuff? I never have, and I’m curious to hear other people’s experiences.

I went onto spam.com and there were some truly scary recipes there: Spam and Turkey Muffins, and Spam and Jam Layered Sandwich, to name two. I feel like I should eat this stuff just to say I’ve eaten it. But does anyone know how it can be prepared to make it palatable? I seem to remember people saying the texture was “spongy,” which doesn’t bode well at all.

Let’s just call it the Words Mean Things Spam Recipe Contest.

Thought experiment

Did Monica Lewinsky hand this country over to George W. Bush?

My answer is, sadly, yes.

Extravagance

I tend to buy as much stuff for myself at Christmastime as I do for other people. You know, you’re out at the stores, looking for gifts, and you think, hey, I’d really like that myself. Not in the spirit of the season, certainly, but it’s a trap I seem to fall into every year.

This year I took it to insane extremes. I bought a 34-inch Sony HDTV 16×9 TV. It’s not huge compared to my old TV, but because it has the wide aspect ratio, watching a widescreen movie on DVD is amazing. It’s a thing of beauty. I feel like I’m living in “the very near future.” It was expensive, but I’m paying it off over two years and I know I’ll have it for many years to come. So I’ve gotten over my anti-consumerist guilt – pretty much.

And as if I needed another reason never to move from my condo, now I have another one: the damn TV is so heavy, I doubt I’ll ever be able to get it out of here.

Anyone want to come over and watch “The Matrix” with me?

A rose is a rose

Have you noticed how conservatives are running away from the term “conservative”? Bill O’Reilly says he runs “The No Spin Zone,” even though the registered Republican should be taking Dramamine every night. Dean Esmay, the neocon’s neocon, calls himself a “liberal” because he’s “open-minded” or something. (I was just called a “reactionary” over there, which shows you how deep the rabbit hole goes.) And you should see him shriek like a banshee when he’s called a neocon, even though he lines up perfectly with the neocon view of the Iraq war.

Why are these guys so ashamed of their views? I know liberals kept “liberal” even when it was tantamount to “vicious baby-killing communist.” Too bad these guys (and so many others like them) don’t have the courage of their convictions.

Words mean things.

I’m just sayin’

I can die a happy man as soon as George W. Bush says the phrase, “President-Elect Dean.”

I figure I’ve got about a year to wait.

Department of Is Anyone Frickin’ Paying Attention?

-Halliburton gets $222 million more business in Iraq, putting their total no-bid haul at $2.26 billion. This despite overcharging for gas (!) in Iraq to the tune of $61 million.

-A U.S. Senator revealed this week that the administration told him and other senators that not only did Iraq have weapons of mass destruction, but they also had capability to deliver those WMDs to East Coast cities.

Chronicling all this stuff is getting tiring. It just keeps coming and coming and coming, like sewage down a drainpipe. And pretty soon, if we don’t watch out, we’re gonna drown.

Celebrity Quote of the Day

“I haven’t changed, though,” insists the former bricklayer. “I still have my assistant put my pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.”

-“King of Queens” star Kevin James on his sitcom fame, in TV Guide

Do the math

The right wing loves Joe Lieberman. The right wing hates (hates hates hates) Howard Dean.

Hmmmm.

I wonder which candidate I should support?