“I was just letting that illegal alien from Guatemala stay in my house for two years out of compassion. I did give her a little spending money here and there, but it certainly wasn’t because she cleaned my pool for me (and a fine job she did, too, even with the nasty gunk in the filter). Yes, she also vaccuumed, mopped, cleaned, and did laundry and ironing. But an employee? No! She was a friend.”