Me: Yes, I’d like to order a pizza to pick up.
Papa Murphy’s: I’m sorry, but we’re out of cheese.
They’re out of cheese? At a pizza place? What kind of world are we living in?
Author: Adam (Page 131 of 224)
“About a Boy”
This is a difficult review for me to write, because on paper this movie is everything that I don’t want to find when I go to the theater: a sentimental tale of a callow man who “grows up,” courtesy of his relationship with a troubled boy.
Starring Hugh Grant, no less.
But the problem is, I really liked it. It is sentimental, but it seems to earn that sentiment, unlike most similar movies churned out by the Hollywood tear-jerking machine. It meanders along amiably, with some good, easy laughs and very few, if any, tears. Toni Collette is excellent as usual – I love how she can look absolutely beautiful in some roles and rather plain in others (like this one). And I actually liked Hugh Grant in it.
I may need to adjust my medication.
I wasn’t intending on watching “Star Wars: Attack of the Clones” today. I was going to wait until sometime next week, after the crowds had thinned out. I went to the theater to see the Richard Gere/Diane Lane “Unfaithful.” But when I saw there were no lines, I thought, why not?
How can I put this delicately?
PILE. OF. CRAP.
If anything, it’s worse than “Episode I.” Everything looks like a really cool video game. And that’s it. It’s one of the most soulless, empty movies I’ve ever seen. Even more byzantine with political intrigue than the first, and hampered by a laughable love story and endless sequences of stuff “blowing up good,” it’s one of the worst misuses of cinema (and film history) ever.
I’m sure my opinion will soften with time – it did with Episode I. But I’m amazed at how much I disliked it, even with my drastically lowered expectations.
Of course, none of this matters. George Lucas has a scary amount of power in Hollywood – and with the American people. He could have filmed Jar Jar Binks reading the Naboo white pages and the thing would have made untold millions.
My recommendation? Stop by AtomFilms and watch the Star Wars fan film festival. Those are the real legacy of “Star Wars.”
As for me, I’m going to go watch “Empire Strikes Back” and clear my head.
Something I don’t understand about science fiction: why does every planet have to have just one ecosystem? In “Star Wars,” Tattooine is desert, Hoth is ice, Endor is forest, and Coruscant is one big city. “Dune” is another example. Is this true of most sci-fi literature? Don’t they think we can understand that an entire planet might include more than one climate? Is Earth some kind of wacky exception? This sort of thing bugs me.
And yes, I will be seeking treatment.
“He planted 18 bombs, six of which detonated. Six out of 18. That’s what you get when you send your son to a state school.”
-The Daily Show’s Lewis Black, on UW-Stout student Lucas Helder.
Shocking pop culture admission: the other day I watched Star Wars Episode I on DVD again, to prepare myself for Episode II – and I didn’t hate it. I didn’t really particularly like anything about it, but I didn’t have that white-hot hatred any more. I accepted that it was an OK, if overcomplicated and stilted, telling of the origins of Anakin Skywalker.
But as I’m writing this now, all the bad stuff is coming back to me: the Trade Federation jargon, Jar Jar, have-no-idea-who-he-is-and-now-he’s-cut-in-half Darth Maul, Anakin’s cries of “Yippee!”, stupid midi-chlorians, and on and on.
I’ve said this many times before, but George Lucas has absolutely forgotten what made the original films so good. They were simple, fun, swashbuckling, pulpy adventures. Movie serials for the new age. In contrast, Episode I was like Star Wars made by a committee of robots.
People say Episode II is better. I hope so.
Did you know that Cap’n Crunch Peanut Butter Crunch (the cereal they eat on Mount Olympus) actually has fewer calories than a lot of those “healthy” cereals?
No need to thank me.
We have a winner!
After much deliberation here at the words mean things home office in Tempe, AZ, the winner of the tagline contest has been chosen:
Kevin Thompson of Oregon, WI!
Kevin used my well-known fondness for The Simpsons’ Dr. Nick Riviera to come up with the winning entry. Congratulations, Kevin! And thanks to all who entered.
‘Alias’ season finale
In a word, underwhelming. Especially because of the fun, well-written rollercoaster ride we’ve been treated to over this freshman season. Ron Rifkin and Amy Irving’s scene together, played in pantomime, was the highlight of an otherwise routine outing. I think it was a mistake to have all Sydney’s worlds collide so soon in the series. But I’m looking forward to where they take me next year.
And I’m so glad my mother isn’t a Russian underworld kingpin.
…or is she?
L.A. Law Reunion Movie
I only watched the first hour – it was that bad. And I was actually looking forward to it. It reminded me of those stage shows where people simulate episodes of the Brady Bunch – except in this case, the characters were played by the same actors.
Aging is hell.