Bite my shiny metal ass.
Author: Adam (Page 9 of 224)
I had a dream last night that I was in a giant amusement park, sort of a live-action version of “The Simpsons.” Everything had that Simpsons cartoon look to it. There were also other cartoon and pop-culture figures running around the streets.
Then somehow I changed from being a tourist to working there. I played Ricky Ricardo and my wife (?) played Lucy; I remember the neighbors, who played Fred and Ethel Mertz, coming in to our house to wake us up for work.
Also, the “sky” was really a dome over the whole park, sort of like “The Truman Show.” I had the power of flight, so at one point in the dream I zoomed up to the top of the dome and touched the fluffy stuff that the clouds were made of.
Wait – I think I just blew my own mind.
Where do I start with this colossal mess? Think of it this way: take “The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen,” and ratchet everything wrong with that movie up to 11. There! You made “Van Helsing.”
Hugh Jackman is a tremendously appealing actor, but he’s lost in a brain-searing stew of overbearing special effects. The score is one musical crescendo after another. Like many contemporary action movies, every scene is a climax; there’s absolutely no ebb and flow. When everything matters, nothing matters.
There are lots of other problems with this movie (don’t get me started on Kate Beckinsale’s accent). But for me it comes down to, getting smacked in the face for two hours isn’t fun.
I think the only way to do this story would have been to make it a real low-budget, low-tech spookfest – an indie “Van Helsing.” Don’t spend millions of dollars showing us a man transforming into a werewolf; we’ve seen that a million times, and it hasn’t been impressive since “American Werewolf in London.” And it’s not scary. What is scary, and interesting, is the unknown; the wait to see what will happen. Here, you’re never waiting – something’s always slamming into your skull.
As the brilliant Jonathan Demme proved in “Silence of the Lambs,” what your brain can imagine is 1,000 times scarier and more engaging than what can be put on screen.
I’ve been banned by another right-wing site, La Shawn Barber’s Corner. Sounds like such a comfy and welcoming place, doesn’t it? 🙂 Well, I guess after she offered her enthusiastic support of the torture at Abu Ghraib, and one of her commenters suggested that I should wear a sign reading “I Support Islamist Thugs!” (love the exclamation point), there’s not much reason for me to hang around there, anyway.
Before the prison scandal broke, I would continually tell myself that things weren’t as polarized in this country as they seemed to me. I was just reading all these right-wing rant sites, so that gave me an unrealistic picture of how fucking insane this country has become.
I was wrong.
When people from U.S. Senators on down are not only excusing torture, but endorsing it, I think we’ve lost our way. The question is whether we can ever find it again.
Kos says it so much more eloquently than I could.
I’m still getting reports from some people that this new site comes up as white text on a white background, which is of course not what I intended. I’ve heard this about Firefox on Windows and Mozilla on Linux, variously. I’ve been continuously tweaking my style sheet to try to make it compliant and fix the problem, but I think it may still exist.
The site displays fine for me on both IE 6 and Firefox, using Windows XP. If you are getting the white-on-white still, please e-mail me using the e-mail link below this post. (That is, if you’ve managed to read these words by highlighting the text. Ugh. And my apologies.) Also, if there are any style sheet gurus who can help me diagnose/fix the problem, I would be eternally grateful. Thanks.
Now that words mean things is back up, Joe Conason of Salon must be reading my archives.
Sony officially unveiled the Portable Playstation (PSP) at the E3 show today. Sweet. I must say, the thought of playing WipeOut (probably the best racing game ever) on a high-resolution widescreen portable makes me drool uncontrollably.
1. Everything happens for a reason.
2. You can’t escape your destiny. It’s part of you.
3. Helping innocents – good. Personal gain – bad.
4. You can’t fight Death. If it’s your time, it’s your time.
5. Protect the Book.
6. If you go back or forward in time, mostly all that will change is your hair.
7. Rose McGowan for Shannen Doherty? Not such a good trade.
8. Wearing red knit elbow warmers that match your red knit tube top is not only not embarrassing, it’s fashionable.
9. All TV shows jump the shark, but for some it’s just a shorter jump than others.
I’ve been absolutely slackjawed this week watching the right twist itself in knots to defend the torture at Abu Ghraib. Here are some common rationalizations:
-It’s not as bad as the terrorists did to us.
-No one apologized to us when they killed 3,000 people.
-No one’s perfect.
-It wasn’t “abuse.” It was just having a good time, letting off some steam.
-This is war – what’ya expect?
-This wouldn’t have happened if women weren’t allowed in the armed services.
-This wouldn’t have happened if there wasn’t so much left-wing indoctrination on college campuses.
-Frat boys do worse to each other all the time.
-If they were going to do it, why oh why did they have to take pictures of it?
-This is just a few bad apples. And who cares about a naked pyramid or two?
-Bush apologizing is like FDR apologizing to Hitler.
-“Get off his back.” -Dick Cheney, on Don Rumsfeld
-Hey, this is great! Maybe this will teach them not to mess with us again.
-They hate us anyway, so what’s the difference?
None of these are made up, or even exaggerated. They come directly from right-wing pundits, who can collectively bite my shiny metal ass.
UPDATE: La Shawn Barber, who provided the FDR/Hitler item above, tells me in the comments to this post on her site that she’s not tying herself in knots over the torture at all. She heartily endorses it.