As much as I enjoyed a whole episode centered on C.J. Cregg, last night’s “West Wing” seemed a little off. The storyline with her father seemed to be wrapped up too neatly, and despite being almost the same age in real life (IMDB to the rescue), Matthew Modine seemed much too young to be Allison Janney’s classmate. Janney and Donald Moffatt, as her Alzheimer’s-afflicted father, had some good scenes together. I was just expecting more from a C.J. episode. I wouldn’t mind seeing Stockard Channing once in a while, either.

Comic Book Guy: Last night’s ‘Itchy & Scratchy’ was, without a doubt, the worst episode ever. Rest assured that I was on the Internet within minutes, registering my disgust throughout the world. As a loyal viewer, I feel they owe me.

Bart: What? They’ve given you thousands of hours of entertainment for free. What could they possibly owe you? If anything, you owe them.

Comic Book Guy: [Pause] Worst. episode. ever.

“I think the most un-American thing you can do is say someone is un-American.”

-John Perry Barlow of the EFF, lambasting the Patriot Act on TechTV

Barlow had a great appearance on The Screen Savers tonight, with lots of quotable lines. My other favorite was when Leo Laporte, doing his best “devil’s advocate” impression, said, “Well, it’s customary in times of war for the government to have expanded powers.” To which Barlow shot back, “Who exactly are we at war with?” (He stole my line.)

I was also reminded again that Sen. Russ Feingold, D-Wis, was the only senator to vote against the Patriot Act. Russ for President!

I can’t remember ever seeing a movie where things turned to crap before your eyes with the stunning quickness of “Adaptation.” One minute you’re watching a mildly diverting movie where even Nicholas Cage playing twins doesn’t seem too irritating, and the next, you’re waist-deep in junk.

The Russian-doll meta-ness of the movie, where a screenwriter puts himself in his own movie to satirize the self-indulgence of hack screenwriters, finally collapses under its own weight. (And that’s just one of about 15 self-referential plot threads in the movie.) Paraphrasing my friend and movie companion Nicole, this movie was written for other screenwriters – and most of us are not screenwriters.

This is a movie that encourages you to pat yourself on the back when you “get it.” (He invents a twin brother, gives him screenwriting credit on the movie, and then has the twin brother in the movie write a schlock script about multiple personalities. Get it?) Well, I got it. And I want to send it back.

Stay away.

One of my clients, the estimable Rochelle Kelvin from Protected Harvest, recently sent me this postcard she got at the Guggenheim Museum in Las Vegas, of all places. I thought it was cool and worth sharing.

Absolute Favorite Weblog Post of the Week,
or Maybe the Month

“Why is Tony Danza so freaking talented?”

-Kevin Thompson, Observations

I’m a compulsive proofreader. I’ve been known to point out errors on restaurant menus, movie marquees, billboards, and lots of other things. So when the Isthmus posted a review of “About Schmidt” where they called Jack Nicholson’s character “Albert Schmidt,” I felt I had to say something. Don’t you think they would want to have someone tell them that the character is actually Warren Schmidt? Doesn’t it make them look foolish to print an error like that? So I sent them an e-mail through the (well-hidden) feedback form on the site.

Either they don’t read those feedback form submissions, or they didn’t care, because the name is unchanged on the site. Of course, it’s also in the printed version of the Isthmus. The sad thing is, maybe no one else will notice it but me.

Proofreading extra
Misspelled word that currently annoys me the most when I see it everywhere online: definately.

Horoscope of the Week: Cancer

Stir other people’s details into something rich and beautiful.

Here’s a question for all you out there who do frequent business on eBay. I recently won an auction for a video game, where the postage was listed as $5 for a tiny cartridge. Apparently then he sent the thing regular mail, and two weeks later it hasn’t arrived. So there’s no way I can prove he didn’t send it, and no way to prove I didn’t receive it. In this situation, am I just out of luck as the buyer? Or does the seller have a responsibility to get the item to me? And thus, has to either refund my money or resend the item?

I don’t do much business on eBay and this has never happened to me before, so I don’t know what the rules are. Any thoughts?

How cold is it?

I’m alternately cursing at the cold, rubbing my hands together furiously, taking long hot showers, and being silently thankful that John’s prediction Wisconsin would become “The Mango State” probably won’t come true. Yet.

Watching Ebert & Roeper give their usual list of crappy movies as the Top 10 for 2002 (Ebert named “Minority Report” the best of the year, unbelievably), I realized I’ve never done that sort of list on the site. So here goes:

1. Punch-Drunk Love
2. Thirteen Conversations About One Thing
3. About Schmidt
4. Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
5. Bowling for Columbine
6. Lovely and Amazing
7. Sunshine State
8. Monsoon Wedding
9. Solaris
10. Notorious C.H.O.

Other than the No. 1 spot, the rest aren’t really ranked in order. They’re all great, for different reasons. I’m pleased about the eclectic mix of movies on my list this year. If you have favorites from 2002 that I didn’t list, I’d love to hear them.

I can only think of one Worst of 2002: “The Truth About Charlie.” Truly horrible.

I used IMDB to look up the release calendar for the year, to make sure I wasn’t missing anything outstanding from earlier in 2002. Did you know that porn/soft porn titles are also indexed on IMDB? My favorite title was “United Colors of Ass 9.” Now there’s a cinematic franchise to be reckoned with.