Best made-up profession: Nipple wrangler.
-Created out of a discussion with John and Nik over lunch at La Hacienda, mulling over who made J.Lo’s nipples so pointy and prominent through her Oscar-night gown.
Having done camera work in the past for large events where you were focusing on speakers at the podium, I could almost hear the producer yelling into his headphones, “Pull up! Pull up!”
Is there a waiting list for this job? I’m getting bored with mine…
I can’t imagine the chafing that this poor woman deals with on a daily basis. Should we send her some udder cream or something?
for the record- and don’t ask how I know… but there is a cream for nipple erection. quite tingly, too.
Man, I spend so much time trying not to make them erect.
Apparently, my nipples are ultra super sensitive and are constantly standing at attention. It’s embarrassing.
Funniest phrase in the English language: udder cream. Go ahead – try saying it without laughing. You can’t do it!
Udder cream is good stuff. All my dairy farmer relatives use it on their hands. It makes me think of how horse shampoo is now bottled for human use. Weird.