Commerce observations
1. I used a “self-checkout” station at Shopko the other day, where you stand at what looks like a giant ATM machine and scan your own purchases. It was fascinating and vaguely disturbing all at the same time.
2. Apparently there’s been a new sales seminar at Best Buy. The salespeople, especially the ones who roam the “Oh my god is he really going to buy a flat-screen TV?” area, are required to stride up to you, shake your hand, announce their name in a loud purposeful voice, and then demand to know yours. Anyone who’s ever read this site will know exactly how I feel about this new strategy.
3. My mortgage bank office is in a mini-mall right next to a Check-N-Go.
Hi Adam!
We have one of those check-yourself-out things at the local QFC. It talks REALLY LOUDLY, so all of a sudden you hear instructions on how to scan your purchases halfway across the store. If it operates on the same dubious premise as the check-yourself-out thing at the library, I am firmly against it.
Give them a name. Then when they repeat it, correct them. Repeat until they give up or you’re escorted out.
“My name? I’m Joe.”
“So tell me Joe, were…”
“No, it’s actually Larry.”
“Larry?”
“No, Bob.”
“Bob?”
“Larry-Bob.”
(odd look)
“Ok, you got me, it’s really Frank.”
“Let me know if you need any help, Frank.”
“No, I’m Steve! Wait, come back…!”
Or you could be, say, “Manuel,” and keep correcting them until they can pronounce it exactly as they do in Barcelona. Or refuse to give your name because you’re in the Witness Protection Program. Actually I think you could have some fun with this, and if it became a huge joke they’d discontinue it.
These ideas are funny but they don’t ridicule who I’d like to ridicule. The Marketing asses and management. I feel wrong toying with the poor little whores on the floor, the ones who sort of actually “work”, have no power, and get paid crap, who are just trying to pay rent. Am I a bleeding heart liberal?