The Hulk

The Hulk

Wow. Where do I start with this one? I went back and forth between being bored and being incredulous (“How can it possibly be this bad?”) so many times I lost count. It was a study in contrasts. The script had many long, flat, earnest passages, and then would suddenly become incomprehensibly stupid. (The attack by the giant poodle, the rock monster section, and the “Whee! I can fly!” bounding come to mind for the second type, although the possibilities are legion. Like, say, any line delivered by Nick Nolte.)

The acting was at two poles too – the “What the hell am I doing?” award shared by Sam Elliott and (especially) Nick Nolte on the one hand, and the “I think I’m stoned but maybe I’m just bored” award shared by Eric Bana and (to a hilarious degree) Jennifer Connelly on the other. Connelly’s two emotions: blank stare, and blank stare (with single tear).

Amazingly, the one thing I *was* worried about, the look of the CGI Hulk, turned out to be the least of this movie’s problems. The big green guy looked OK, especially in the scene where Nolte reached up and touched his face – you could almost feel the squishiness of Hulk’s skin.

I could tell Ang Lee was really trying here, but I think that’s part of the problem. Everything was so achingly earnest, it killed any fun that might have been had around the edges of this colossal mess.

See at your own risk. And if you do, you might want to pack a lunch – this puppy is 2 hours 20 minutes.